Still In Love With You

Things in life just never cease to amaze me. Kids are always at the front of what we do in life. We are always trying to teach and instruct them in the ways of life. Girls, sometimes I feel like I have done as much as possible to give you a direction to follow. I have made sure you see that ultimately the choice is yours to make. One time I will hear from one and then not the other. Then it will be just the opposite. I think of the Bible story of the prodigal son. I have daughters and though I've never been without them, I have spent the last year without either of them under the same roof with me. One for nearly 4 years and the last one for over a year. Each for a different reason, but gone just the same. I welcome the day that I can slaughter a fatted calf and have big party to celebrate them being home. A dads heart for his daughters is the most fragile thing in the world. The big tough protector of the family, the head lion in his pride. No one can touch them, no one can bring them harm. His own death is the only way to them. But when the day is over, it is the daughters themselves who own him. They hold his heart in their hands. Their love for him is what makes his heart beat. His legacy will live on through them. Their life a testimony of the love they have been shown. There is no one who has or ever will love you as much as I do. I hope that one day you can see that and that all the those long boring talks about life sink in and are passed on to your own kids. It saddens my heart to not see you every day. A dads heart, fragile and exposed but strong enough to be vulnerable for examination. There you find love so deep it cannot be measured. Daddy's girls. They are daddy's girls til the day he dies. Age is of no concern when that phrase is used. I love you both so much.  TTP

Birthday

It was her birthday on Monday, the youngest that is. Looking forward to a visit from all the family, especially the oldest daughter.  I got a hug and a how are you. Tension is stressed to say the least. I really miss her. I just keep hoping she will find her way to see that all the things I've been doing is for her best interest. I love her so much. I need her to make better choices for herself. She has this idea that just because you were friends with someone, that it means your friends to the end. The end is when they lead you down the wrong road and care about you anymore. J you have to find yourself and begin leading your own life. This has to be about you right now until you get back to a better place and solid ground for your feet. I love you sweet heart. Dad